you guys were way drunker than both of me
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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