yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
and you fell through a lawn chair
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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