I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
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I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
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they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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