i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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