we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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