if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
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