his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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