What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
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Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
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God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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