just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize