the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Randomize