I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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