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Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
This baby is an asshole
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Randomize
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