im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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