I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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