News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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