i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize