I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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