I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize