I can tuck mytits in my pants
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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