There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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