Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
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Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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