I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Randomize