A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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