are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
40s are totally the cure
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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