Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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