i don't like sucking hair
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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