My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Panties = found
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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