I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize