Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize