Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
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I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
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Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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