bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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