Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
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We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
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How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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