Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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