I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I just gargled with NyQuil
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize