Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Green mimosas i think yes
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Life without a bra equals bliss.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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