she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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