looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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