I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize