He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize