so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize