i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
May the power of my ass compel you!!
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
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