Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize