i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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