Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize