She went from zero to smokin in five shots
It's like God shit irony all over that family
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
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Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
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Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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