We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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