WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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