Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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