I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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