ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
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